Monday, July 30, 2007

Yeah ... about that ...

Many have commented "you realize you just tossed the subject of infertility into the blog world". Yes, I do. I did it that way on purpose in the hopes that it might just slide by. 90% of the people who KNOW us already knew this info. My husband has been trying to get me to post about it for awhile (in fact he's threatened to do so himself). We've talked plenty about loss, but nada about treatment. Many people reading this blog are people I simply don't know, and many people are people I do know but REALLY wish they WERE NOT reading. This stupid blog has gone far beyond what was intended, and it's uncomfortable. It's called being vulnerable.

So why I am addressing it so pointedly now? Well, Jason and I have been talking about your ignorance (take that generally please). I have been working with Hannah's Prayer Christian Ministries for awhile & recently have had the privilege of joining the Board of Directors. This is an incredible opportunity to spread awareness to the world of infertility, pregnancy/ adoption loss, infant death, embryo adoption, fostering, and local & international adoption through support groups, Internet information, written pamphlets, conferences, seminars, pastoral training, medical care, etc. – the dreams are endless! Being involved w/ HP has also greatly opened my eyes to what these families endure and how completely ignorant the general population is.

So, I am going to be blunt with you (it's our blog – stop reading now if you offend easily). WE DON'T WANT YOUR ADVICE. Standing on our heads after the deed isn't going to help. Adoption is not the quick answer to conceiving (in fact you'd be quite surprised at the actual stats involved with that). We don't need a vacation or to "just relax". We are neither obsessed nor jealous and we genuinely love our friends’ babies to death. Yes I know I am young, but quite frankly an incompetent cervix & natural progesterone levels don't care about one's age. We are NOT being punished by God & yes I know Sarah had a baby when she was in her 90s. Whatever your brother in laws, uncles, 2 nd cousin did to get pregnant, we don't want to hear about it. If however, you would like to pray for us, please do so!

So, I've given you a deeper glimpse to us. And a disclaimer to boot. A future pregnancy for us would involve a surgery at 13+ weeks and we're fully aware of the risks and benefits, etc. We've chosen the route based on conversations with a pernatologist, our dr., and much research. Treatments are personal & we probably won't be sharing details here. If you have an authentic question we are actually very open to discussing our path and what God is doing in us. If you're just being nosey – well, STOP! – it's annoying.

We don't know where this will lead, but thankfully JOY does not depend on circumstance. Things are not coming easy, but we're living each day in growth, and we know struggles are a calling to something higher. The size & depth of OUR family is known and it will be played out, and it will be AMAZING (even if it remains the 3 of us).

A downside is: this has put a bit of a halt on our adoption plans. We're very grateful our adoption agency is patient. OH WAIT! You didn't know we were adopting – did you?

Jason & Traci

12 comments:

  1. Anonymous12:21 PM

    Thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing this.

    You go girl!

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  2. I KNOW YOU PUT THE VIDEO THERE FOR OUR BENIFIT - NOT REALLY FOR YOU. THANKS FOR HAVING THE VOLLEY'S TO DO SO. I APPRECIATE THE STAND YOU MADE TODAY, AND I AM THANKFUL I HAVE SOMEONE LIKE YOU ON MY SIDE.

    THANKS FOR CARING.

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  3. Anonymous11:28 PM

    Words cannot express the pride I have in you. I am so very proud of the stand you've taken, but more importantly I am proud of YOU and JASON. Keep your head up high, your knees on the floor, and keep praying for your children without ceasing. I know I am.
    I Love you,
    Mom

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  4. Anonymous9:16 AM

    I am bawling my eyes out from that video, it is so precious. We have 2 bio children & 1 adopted (foster to adopt). Though we didn't deal with infertility that song speaks volumes about all of the little lives who are thrown away and the parents who are doing what they can to grow their families.

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  5. WAIT! Do you mean to tell me that standing on your head after sex doesn't work better then visiting the RE? I've been giving that advice to everyone!!! ha-ha. j/k.

    Thanks for sharing with us. Now I know how to better pray. And a lot of other things seem to make sense, especially regarding adoption!

    Love you - Hope.

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  6. (((Traci)))
    Praying for you and Jason as you continue to travel this road.
    And praying for those who read this for the first time.
    Love,
    Thelma

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  7. i've said it before and i'll say it again - you're one of my heroes! I love you guys...

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  8. Thank you so much for sharing so openly. Know I will be praying as you continue to travel this journey.

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  9. traci
    You have so many of the things that I have wanted all these years. Many people just don't get it. I have often wanted to tell many family members through these years to PRAY...basically telling them to keep their advice to themselves about the course and path that God was leading us to do going through 4 Invitro's.
    You are always an inspiration to me.
    Esther

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  10. Anonymous10:45 PM

    good blog, i like it

    ReplyDelete