Monday, September 14, 2009


I feel like every update is an Ella update. Part of me wants to add “sorry” to that, and part of me wants you to pray!

Ella had her first non-hospital Fetal Non-Stress Test today. Aside from not holding still {living up to her highly popular reputation among the hospital nurses}, I think she did great. Trying to get a 20 minute reading out of this girl takes at least an hour. They even “buzzed” her, which is the first time I’ve encountered that, and when I asked Dr. T what he was doing he responded with {PG-13 rated!} “Probably pissing her off”. It was hilarious. You probably had to be there, but it was. {excuse the very non-flattering photo}

One thing about Dr. T is that he is readable. I am not sure if it’s just with us … but, most doctors are hard to read. They relay medical info like it’s nothing. With Dr. T we can visually see when he’s not happy. It’s sort of how I take news now-a-days. Does Dr. T look upset? I don’t remember him being this way in the beginning, but he certainly is now. Today, during the u/s … he didn’t look too happy.

Apparently, the amniotic fluid has not lowered at all – therefore, the Indocin didn’t help. We talked about my comfort level {yeah, um, I can’t breathe} and the amount I am still contracting and he said he’s ready to have some of the fluid removed if I am. We told him I can hold off {b/c at the time I was thinking it was simply for my comfort … and really who needs to breathe!? Ha!}, so we’re going to hold off until Thursday when I do my next NST. I do want to clarify with him that removing the fluid is for my comfort only … if it will benefit Ella in any way we’re all over it, but that wasn’t the sense I got. The fluid will reaccumulate, and it will likely be a process that we’ll have to repeat. It is an invasive procedure with risk of breaking the bag.

I’ll be 31 weeks on Thursday. 3 more weeks is the goal … ! We’ll deliver @ a Level III NICU – an impressive one at that. A lot of people seemed confused about what will happen if she’s born now {ranging from her not being viable to her coming home with us} … here’s some info on preemies

My tummy is HARD … and everyone who feels it states “wow, that’s what you feel like right before you deliver”. I am holding on to the FFN test that was NEGATIVE to buy us a little more time. She was head down today, but with this gymnast inside of me – that’s probably already changed a billion times.

I don’t know how to convey how thankful we are for everything ya’ll have done for us – including pray.

I am off to build a coconut tree w/ the alphabet w/ Josiah {while remaining on the couch, of course!}. Chicka Chicka Boom Boom!

Here’s our boys to make you smile …


  1. Anonymous10:40 AM

    Praying Ella bean stays in 3 more weeks! I will also pray for peace and comfort! Our God is an awesome God :) Melisa

  2. Negative FFN is VERY encouraging at this point! {hug} Continuing to pray.

  3. just wanted to say hello and that i'll be following your blog. not sure what i clicked to get here.. i seem to click and click and find new blogs i just HAVE to follow.. but i had many many NSTs in my pregnancy, so the entry titled "NST" was what caught my attention. what draws me to you, after reading some, is your strong faith. and the fact that on your daughters' grave, it says "born into the arms of Jesus" and that is what i said about my daughter the very first day. it's since been written just about everywhere, including my blog, facebook, and the prayer cards we handed out at her funeral. also in one of your entries about loss, you said something about sobbing at the grave and that God loves to meet people at intimate places like that... someone in my bible study (a new person we dont quite know yet but love her so far)said just that very thing to me.. she said "just let God meet you where you are." Wow. Ive also said things like you said "God didnt cause this to happen, we live in a world of sadness, but he did allow it." that has been my phiolsophy and belief since my first journey with grief, when my father died 5 years ago, and has continued now that i lost my daughter i just typed "love my daughter" by accident first, instead of "lost", though of course they are both true.

    nice to meet you. praying for Ella!!