Friday, June 04, 2010

It has been 5 years.

I know I should tell you something profound.

Or inspiring.

Or depressing.

Or something.


But I have nothing.


I sometimes wonder if they would be like Ella {or Ella like them I suppose}.

Or if there would even be an Ella.

I know there would not be a Josiah.

Does any of that make sense?

Point: God knows what He is doing. He allows. He prevents. Sometimes it sucks big time and it hurts like nothing has ever hurt before. And sometimes it is wonderful and memorizing.

All I know is that 5 years seems like a very, very long time ago. And tonight, I kind of wish that were not so.

Happy Birthday, baby girls!

{We had dinner @ Orange Hill!}


  1. Oh Traci, You don't need words. Your pictures are beautiful, and speak volumes.
    I have tears... I don't have any words of comfort. But I have tears. You make perfect sense. In my world, if Gabe was here, I know there most certainly would not have been a Bella. If Bella were here, there's no way I would know this amazing little person that is Emma. Do I love Emma more than Gabe or Bella? No I don't believe I do. But I'm so glad God knew what he was doing even though it's hurt SO bad to get here. I know the song is talking about a romantic love, There's a couple of lines of a song that say so much of how I feel when I think about Gabe, Bella and Emma, "It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true... God blessed the broken road, that lead me straight to you"

    As a side note, Emma's first trip to the cemetery was this week to put flowers on my mom's grave.

  2. Traci - your girls will never be forgotten. Even here halfway round the world. And thank you. Tonight I needed that reminder that God has a plan. Love to you all Kat

  3. Anonymous7:09 AM

    Traci-I get what you are saying. Jesse is such an amazing little man and he would not be here had I not lost his brother, I totally get it, and like you , I have no words. ((HUGS)) Melisa